I just got back from my Grandma's. She's well into her 90s (her exact age is a secret all family members have sworn to take to the grave), and very sick. She's had several minor heartattacks in the past months. And diabetes and a butload of other problems. But you wouldn't know it. She has three grandchildren and loves them to bits.

My grandma, or abuelita as we call her, is Spanish. The first english words she learned was the prayers in church. She still watches mass on TV when she can.

As the days pass she's forgetting more and more. She remembers who we are, but not much else. She'll mistake my brother for my dad, and my sister for me. She'll tell us to call her sister to her, her sister who has been dead for 20 years. She's forgetting more and more english. Only my sister and dad are fluent in spanish, my brother and I are okay at it.

But today when the priest came to give her the Eucharist and confession, I heard her speak more english than she has for months. She remembers every word for every prayer. In both english and spanish.

I remember one time she was very sick, seeing things and remembering the Spanish civil war she'd been a Nurse in. I was sitting by her bed and crying. She was seeing people in white, angels. We thought she was going to die then for sure. For five minutes her eyes were clear and she told me in the best english I've heard her speak that God was waiting for her, but He knew she had to stay with us until we were ready to say goodbye. She would never leave us until we were ready, and even then she'd always be with us and we could always find her in church and through God.

Its been three months since that. And she's still waiting for us to be ready.

Is it selfish that I don't want to be ready and want her to stay around for ever?

I don't know. But I do know that my abuelita bonita lucita says that God exists. She believes in him. And if everyone else declared he didn't exists, it wouldn't matter. Her word is enough for me.